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How to Be Happy with Myself ? Take this 3 steps and Find Out :

If you feel like you’re on a constant quest for inner bliss, you might be asking yourself: If there was one secret on how to be happy in your relationship or marriage, workplace, home life and family wouldn’t you have learned it by now?

Are you constantly searching, asking people who seem happy, reading articles and watching videos on How to Be Happy with Myself ? If so, you’re certainly not alone. Online search engines get millions of people asking this question, and the internet is full of promises that this strategy or that formula will deliver you to a place of lasting happiness. Yet, many miss the main point: they never even touch on the fact that the real key to happiness with others is happiness with yourself.



If you haven’t noticed or been here yourself (most of us have), an insecure person’s need for constant approval is exhausting. Those who are happy and love themselves don’t hang around with that kind of negative energy. Since we can’t change other people, lead by example and others will follow in your footsteps, becoming good role models themselves. Read on to learn the five tips that will help you become happier with yourself.

So… How to Be Happy with Myself …

1. Forgive Yourself
Forgive yourself for anything and everything you think you caused that was bad in your or someone else’s life. You can’t go back for a do-over, so learn the lesson and move forward, promising to better handle any similar situation that may arise. Now you’re freed up to relax more and have greater peace of mind without beating yourself up over guilt and resentment.

2. Understand That You Are Complete
And understand that, “You complete me,” was just a cheesy line in a Tom Cruise movie. (I loved that line at first too… for a few seconds, until I realized how inaccurate it was. Keep reading to learn why!) The reason most of us don’t feel complete, and latched onto that line like it was the end-all be-all relationship concept is because we’re waiting for someone else to be or do something that makes us feel whole.

First of all, as mentioned, we are already complete. But even if we weren’t, no one else would be able to complete us anyway — it’s impossible. When we put our happiness in someone else’s hands we set them up for failure. Why would we do that to someone we care about? Because we don’t realize we are the only ones who control our happiness.

Does this mean if you’re unhappy it’s your fault? Yes. Does this also put you in a position of power in your life? Absolutely. You want your relationships to be the joining of two complete individuals to create a third, larger entity so that you’re a part of something, not just half of something. The whole “my other half” thing just breeds insecurity, which leads to the most painful relationship challenges like jealousy, abuse and infidelity. Why on earth would you want your happiness to be determined by someone or something outside of yourself?

3. Get To Know Yourself
When do you feel you’re at your best when you’re alone? Are you reading your favorite book overlooking a beautiful view? Enjoying your favorite tea, watching a movie? Shopping outside at the farmers market? Listening to your favorite music? How does your body feel? Healthy? Need some work? No one will be happier than you when your body looks good and functions well. This is a good confidence builder and when you have more confidence, you look better and healthier, and carry yourself in a completely different way that attracts confident people to you.

Here’s a personal example: I had a spider vein on my lower leg and didn’t feel comfortable in shorts for years. I finally had it removed and couldn’t believe how much better I felt. My posture and confidence in shorts was much improved. Some things are easily fixable and for the others we may need to adjust our perspective a bit.

What are your favorite parts of yourself — your appearance, your character traits, your values or your personality? Do you get a kick out of your great sense of humor? I get a kick out of mine. I laugh to myself quite often! Are you really excited that you value honesty, which has attracted honest, genuine people to you? Are your eyes or hands or knees your favorite part of your body? Get to know your favorite parts and love them all.

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How to Stop Thinking about Problems and Stay Calm in the Present ?

Every one of us knows what it’s like to be plagued by an unpleasant or unwanted thought. It could be a nagging self-doubt, a disturbing story from the evening news, the humiliation of being recently rejected by a potential love interest. Try as you might to block it out, the image or feeling pops up over and over again. It makes you miserable, and leaves you feeling very much a virtual prisoner of your own cruel mind…

For a long time, psychologists believed that allowing yourself to go ahead and think about white bears was the only solution – eventually, since your brain wasn’t on the lookout for these thoughts and actively trying to block them anymore, they would fade. But thoughts can be blocked, without rebounding. To do this, there are two things you need to know.

How to Stop Thinking about Problems

1) First, remember that blocking a thought is always a bit difficult, no matter what the thought is. But just because it’s hard, that does not mean that, on some level, you need to think that particular thought. Your brain doesn’t necessarily have a hidden agenda. The real irony is that believing that it does is actually what creates rebound! In other words, you will continue to be haunted by a thought if you give the difficulty you have blocking it out more meaning and importance than it deserves.

2) Second, you need a strategy for handling the thought when it does come. A good if-then plan is just what the doctor ordered for coping with unwanted thoughts and disruptive feelings (see my previous post, Be Careful What You Plan For, for more on planning).

The key is to plan out, in advance what you will do when the thought pops up in your mind. It can be as simple as saying to yourself, “If the thought comes, then I will ignore it.” Some may prefer to replace the unwanted thought or feeling with a more positive one. In one study, tennis players who were plagued by pre-match anxiety and self-doubt conquered these thoughts with the plan “If I doubt myself, then I will remember all the times I’ve won in the past.”

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